nick carnes – Nickcarnes.com

December 16, 2020December 16, 2020

My First 40 Years

Today, is my 40th Birthday, which means I have actually completed 40 years of life. I was thinking the other day about some of the things I’ve learned so far, or some of the things I have grown to appreciate, so I thought I’d share some of them here with you.

Jesus is King. My life belongs to Him.
Salvation is by grace alone through faith alone in Jesus alone. Don’t allow people to trap you in legalism or in performance based religion.
My wife and children are the greatest earthly treasures God has ever given to me. I am a wealthy man because of them.
You must be friendly in order to have friends, but just because someone is friendly doesn’t mean they are your friend.
Actions DO speak louder than words. Show me, don’t just tell me.
The end goal is worth the hard work: I can only expect to receive what I put into something whether relationships, career, knowledge, etc.
Be who God created you to be. Don’t be a cheap imitation of someone else.
People will hurt you, but Jesus never leaves or forsakes you.
Forgive quickly. Forgive frequently. Forgive indiscriminately. Extend radical grace.
Always do the right thing, even when it doesn’t make sense or immediately benefit you. Both blessing and consequence are typically delayed.
Always remain teachable.
Find a mentor. Find a coach.
Don’t allow anyone to hold you back, not even yourself.
Not everyone will believe in you. That’s okay. You keep believing, and keep trusting the God who you belong to.
Family is your greatest priority. Family is your greatest ministry.
You won’t ever regret being generous and giving sacrificially.
True love is revealed in how you care for people who can’t repay you.
True character is revealed by what you do when no one else is watching.
Self-Righteousness is unappealing. It’s equally as unrighteous as the sinner you might look down on.
Every day is a gift. Not everyone has lived to 40. Not everyone is as physically able as God has allowed me to be.
It’s an undeserved blessing to live in the home God gave my family. I never take it for granted and remember it was given to us in His perfect timing. One month later, we couldn’t have afforded it. Not everyone has a roof over their head, A/C & Heat, a comfortable bed, clothes, or a pantry full of food. I am better off than my parents were when I was a kid.
God is sovereign.
God repays evil. You don’t have to.
You don’t need a lot of friends. One or two good ones will do.
Dream big.
Take risks.
Failure isn’t final. Dream big again. Take even more risks.
Choose to look for the positive in every situation.
Negativity is a poison to your soul and pushes people away.
God’s Word is absolute truth and will never lead you wrong.
Find a great spouse and fight for the success of your marriage.
Be honest.
Talk to God. He is present and He hears you.
“Keep it Kind.” – Kimberly Mullins. You can’t control other people, but you can choose to be kind.
I appreciate the Christian home and foundation given to me by my parents.
Don’t take people for granted, they won’t always be with you.
You are entitled to nothing. No one owes you anything.
As a Christian, remember what you owe God and how He saved you from it. Perspective changes our attitude.
Some things are worth fighting for, some are worth dying for.
I am saved to live for God’s Kingdom, not my own kingdom.
Our measure of success is obedience – Shane Padgett
Don’t take yourself so seriously.
There is always more to learn….

Join the Conversation: What are some valuable lessons you’ve learned in your own?

November 10, 2015November 20, 2019

The Bigger Problem with the Starbucks Red Cup Controversy

large_Starbucks-Red-Cups-2015

Nicki and I were traveling to Nashville on Sunday afternoon when I had to take a quick restroom break. I walked up to the urinal and there it was, the infamous gospel tract. I was just about to post a photo of it on Instagram and tell all the Christians in the world how they’re wasting time and resources by leaving their tracts on urinals (because who really wants to pick something up off the urinal? Think about it). When I read what it said and starting thinking about the question it asked, I completely forgot to take the picture.

“Do you want to be a Christian?”

Do I?

If I were not already a Christian, would I want to become one at this moment in my life?

What does becoming a Christian look like? What does it mean to become a Christian?

I wonder what non-Christians would say when they saw that question?

If a non-Christian didn’t have a Bible & wanted to know what Christianity looked like, what it meant to be a Christian, and what it would do for their life, who would they ask those questions? Who would they turn to in order to have those questions answered? Christians?

With the current controversy over Starbucks’ new red cups for the Christmas and Holiday season, my immediate thought was, “Do I want to become a Christian and become a scrooge about anything and everything I don’t like?”

Seriously! As a Christian reading the question on the Christian tract that was my exact thoughts about Christianity. Do you wonder if that’s what the world thinks about us? How can we rightly ask anyone if they want to become a Christian?

Christian to Non-Christian: “Do you want to become a Christian?”
Non-Christian to Christian: “What is a Christian?”
Christian to Non-Christian: “Hold on, let me finish updating my post on Facebook…. ‘Starbucks is furthering the war on Christmas; they took the snowflakes and ornaments off their Christmas cups; if you buy coffee from them be sure to tell them your name is Merry Christmas (it’s okay if I lie about my name because it’s for Jesus) and while I’m here posting let me splatter a few more rants and criticisms on my wall like how Christians shouldn’t eat Girl Scout Cookies and by the way I hate this and I hate that. Why can’t more non-Christians act like Christians? What is this world coming to? Christian businesses should be free to serve who they want and don’t want, but secular businesses should accommodate Christians! Also, here are a few more internet conspiracy theories that probably aren’t true, but I saw them posted on someone’s wall’ ….a Christian looks like me and we don’t go to Hell when we die!”
Non-Christian to Christian: “No thank you, your life looks like a living Hell!”

That’s not even the biggest problem with this whole controversy.

What is the Bigger Problem?

The bigger problem with the Starbucks Red Cup Controversy, and any others like it, is the GOSPEL. Everyone ranting about Starbucks not printing their cups correctly are promoting a works based theology which teaches people they must be morally good people to be right with God & to be accepted by him.

Christians: God’s walking talking billboards are going to rise up against a non-Christian company that has no claim on Christianity and demand they do Christmas our way, or we will reject them, and they are somehow supposed to believe that we are promoting a God who extends radical grace to all people? A God of love, mercy, and forgiveness? If Starbucks’ employees, executives, and the world don’t see it in us, how are they supposed to be introduced to our God and our Savior, Jesus?

Let’s just ignore that God accepts us in Jesus. He doesn’t accept us because we did Christmas his way, or we did church his way. He doesn’t love and forgive us because we first did life his way. No, he loves, forgives, and accepts us before we know what is right and wrong. He chooses us way before we choose him. He didn’t wait for us to start doing anything right or stop doing anything wrong, yet that’s exactly the life we demand of companies like Starbucks and sadly it’s probably what many are demanding of other people in their life as well.

Every Christian who has decided to boycott, shout at, and raise a fuss over red cups has decided they would rather teach: Do good Starbucks and Christians will be cool with you (Bonus: God will be too, because God is just like us!).

Do what’s right Starbucks and you’ll honor God and Jesus by keeping CHRIST in Christmas.

Essentially, we’re not concerned with you as people. We’re not concerned with your hearts being transformed so you can see Jesus for who he really is. We’re only concerned that you accommodate our Holiday in which we celebrate the birth of our Savior, who you’ll never meet, if it’s up to us.

With every post, with every shout, and with every complaint we’re telling Starbucks, their employees, and the world that Christian-like performance is what Jesus and his followers expect, and require, to be accepted.

This is not the gospel.

As a Christian, the gospel is your greatest stumbling block to requiring Christian behavior from a non-Christian business or individual.

[tweetthis remove_twitter_handles=”true”]The gospel is your greatest stumbling block to requiring Christian behavior from a non-Christian[/tweetthis]

You want Outrage? Be Outraged

If Christians want to be outraged, let’s start within our own camp, not with those who are outside it.

Paul instructed Christians to be careful how we treat outsiders:

Colossians 4:5-6 NLT Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity. ⁶Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone.

The writer of Hebrews told Christians to provide accountability for those within our own faith:

Hebrews 3:12-13 NLT Be careful then, dear brothers and sisters. Make sure that your own hearts are not evil and unbelieving, turning you away from the living God. ¹³You must warn each other every day, while it is still “today,” so that none of you will be deceived by sin and hardened against God.

[tweetthis remove_twitter_handles=”true”]If Christians want to be outraged, let’s start within our own camp, not with those who are outside it.[/tweetthis]

Do you want to be outraged by something? How about….

Very few Christians give sacrificially or generously. Giving per capita to the local church is 2.5% – many who say they love the church and are ‘All In’ for the vision and mission, give nothing [stats]
Local churches are handcuffed from doing necessary ministry, not only because of lack of finances, but due to lack of people using their gifts, talents, and abilities to serve due to the demands of their career, personal recreation, youth sports, hobbies, vacations, and other time consuming activities.
In 2014, a Lifeway poll showed that 78% of Christians did not share their faith and 59% did not invite anyone to attend church with them [stats]
An estimated 663 Million people (1 in 10) lack access to clean water [stats]
842 Million people worldwide lack proper nutrition [stats]
An estimated 7 Million children are orphans worldwide [stats]
Approximately 2 BILLION people have never heard the gospel worldwide [stats]

Why do we expect non-Christians to honor Jesus, who hasn’t yet transformed their hearts and radically saved them, when we claim he has transformed our hearts and radically saved us, but based on the stats above we don’t honor him ourselves? Has Christ really transformed our hearts? Do we want to keep Christ in Christmas because it’s our way of worshiping and honoring his birth?

Based on just a few of the stats above, do we really have time to be fussing about snowflakes and ornaments on red cups? Do we really have a leg to stand on when we say people are trying to change Christmas, when Christmas hasn’t changed us?

I like what Job said to his religious friends:

“If only you could be silent! That’s the wisest thing you could do.” Job 13:5 NLT

Maybe we can learn from that. Christian friends, we have much work to do within our own walls. Let’s leave non-believers alone and work to ensure our hearts are seeking Jesus and our hands are serving his people. Maybe, just maybe non-believers will see we are his followers because of our love, for them, not decorated cups.

August 5, 2015August 5, 2016

Big News for My Family and New Passion

In 46 days there will be some big changes for my family and for New Passion Church. In 46 days, New Passion will have already celebrated our 6th birthday and as great of a milestone as that is, it’s been a long, tiring, challenging, yet rewarding 6 years. Although we knew the right answers and felt prepared mentally for the challenges of planting a church in a military and government community, it’s a whole new ball game once you actually put the wheels in motion. Within two weeks of our launch, we had two new families, who loved the church (and there wasn’t much to love back then), receive orders to move. Launching with 37 people, 16 of which were children, we needed people who agreed with our mission and loved our style of ministry to plug in with us early, but immediately we realized the challenges that would lie ahead of us in the years to come. It didn’t even take a month to realize theory and reality are two totally different things.

[tweetthis remove_hidden_urls=”true”]Theory and reality are two totally different things[/tweetthis]

The Struggle

Over the last 6 years, all of our leaders have either been volunteers or bi-vocational; meaning we’ve all been distracted from giving proper attention to the needs and demands of the church, because we have to pay bills and put food on the table for our families. Thankfully, God has given us great leaders, but that means in the business world they (including myself) are involved in high demanding jobs that take a lot of attention and require a lot of time. At times, this has only served to hinder New Passion. A big part of our struggles have been the lack of time and ability to train and develop new leaders and volunteers who can assist us in some of the everyday/every week ministry responsibilities, especially when we only have many of our people for a limited amount of time, before they’re shipped off. Without properly trained people, when things have to get done, it falls back on our shoulders. I cannot speak for the rest of my team, but for me personally, I am exhausted and I have decided I cannot pastor New Passion full time, take on additional roles we have not found qualified people for: Youth Pastor, Graphic Designer, Publications, etc, in addition to working a job that demands 45-50 hours per week while also having me on call 24/7. I can no longer work 5 days per week, full time, and then come home on Friday night mentally and physically exhausted, yet still have to stay up until 5 a.m. to write a message for Sunday and then with just a few hours sleep try to spend a little time with my family before working almost all night Saturday to make sure programs and everything are ready for Sunday. I can no longer require my children to sacrifice being children by not being able to participate in extra curricular activities with school and the community. Nicki cannot play the role of both parents for three children and get them to practices and games and recitals or whatever the event might be by herself, because I cannot be there due to an evening meeting, counseling session, or something else required of me as a full time bi-vocational pastor. I have been a poor leader for New Passion because I have been spiritually, physically, and relationally unhealthy, myself. My first ministry is not to the church, it’s to my family. So, I have had to pray about and make a decision for the future of my family and for New Passion. On one hand, I have a full time job that provides a majority of my income to provide for my family; I do ministry there and have had great success. On the other hand, I have a church that I felt God lead me to start; it’s been tough and it has struggled to get to a place where it can support staff; beyond a handful of leaders, there has been very little desire expressed by our people to make this a priority. It has not been an easy decision, but I have to put God and my family first.

[tweetthis]I have been a poor leader because I’ve been spiritually, physically & relationally unhealthy, myself[/tweetthis]

Moving On

I have made the decision to move on, in 46 days. My final day will be Sunday, September 20, 2015. This is the right decision, it’s the healthiest decision, and it’s the most obedient and faith driven decision. After September 20, I will no longer be the CSRC Manager at the Salvation Army. I have officially resigned and will be stepping out on faith by trusting God to provide for New Passion in such a way that I can focus full time on leading the church God called me to start. Without a full time pastor, the church will never become all God intended it to be. This decision is not being made independently, but rather through the guidance of our executive leaders and our pastoral advisory team. The decision was actually made over a year ago, but the finances were not there.

[tweetthis]I have made the difficult decision to move on, in 46 days. My final day will be Sunday, September 20[/tweetthis]

Permission to Go Second

The Carnes family is going first. This is the church we believe God called us to start and therefore if we are going to preach that we are called to live by faith, we must set the example by first living it. The biggest step of faith I ever took was to launch New Passion with $15,000 and 37 people, but now we are casting ourselves on the mercy and generosity of the very people God called us to lead. The finances are still not 100% where I would like them to be in order to make this move, but that’s why it’s called faith. If we are going to see our church go to the next level, this move has to be made. We are taking the first step of faith and hope it will spur you on, to go second. Many of you are generous and consistent givers. Thank you! You have been the catalyst to help us see hope in making this move through our growth. It’s you who are helping us lead people to a passionate relationship with Jesus! However, there are still many of you who have yet to take a step of faith for yourself. You either don’t give, you don’t give consistently, or you don’t give sacrificially and generously. When you give, you’re not giving to the Carnes family, although one of the responsibilities of the local church is to provide for their leaders. When we give, we are first giving to God and He distributes the money in the local church for the work of the ministry and the advancement of our mission. He does this through the church leaders He sets in place and He does this through the people by adopting our annual budget. The act of giving and the characteristic of being generous is an act of worship towards God, it’s also an act of faith and obedience.

One of the reasons I have been bi-vocational for the last 6 years was to prevent our family from being a burden to the church and handcuffing us financially from being able to do ministry, however I can no longer allow another person’s lack of faith or disobedience in generous giving to be an excuse to be disobedient myself by not taking the step of faith God has called me to. I am asking you to step out in faith with us. Start giving if you haven’t; give consistently if you’ve been inconsistent; give generously if you’ve been stingy. Am I asking you this because my family’s welfare is dependent on God through the church? No, I asked this of you when I had a paycheck coming in from an outside source. I’m asking you this because it’s spiritually healthy and right and it allows us to do even more ministry and eventually add even more staff to help lead us to become a great church. The responsibility of the church is to take care of their leaders; we are dependent on you following Jesus in your own personal life and taking the steps of faith He calls you to. Statistics show that a church should have one full time staff member per 86 people in attendance; therefore we should truly not be talking about adding one full time staff member, but two. When we don’t have the right people on the bus, we’re prevented from getting to where we should be; or we get there slower and with more bumps in the road. When we don’t have the finances to put fuel in the bus, we get nowhere!

Your Turn

When you use your gifts and talents to serve at New Passion, you make us stronger and healthier by helping take the load off of those doing too much. Listen to my sermon, Stagnant Cells, from a couple of weeks ago and then make a decision to do your part by serving in a ministry environment or on a service team.

You can help fuel the bus to help us get where God wants us to go, by making a commitment to give. You can start today through our online giving option. It allows for one time gifts, gifts by guest, and reoccurring giving. You can give at New Passion, on Sundays, by way of offering envelopes or through the Connection Point KIOSK. Every financial gift given to support the ministry and mission of New Passion Church is 100% tax deductible.

You play a much larger role in the local church than you think. You help make New Passion an awesome and effective church in Grovetown and in every place God has given us influence. Church is not about sitting in a seat, hearing a sermon, and going home. Church is about coming together to be encouraged, to be challenged, and to be an encourager before going home to live out your faith in the community and in your workplace.

[tweetthis]You play a much larger role in the local church than you think.[/tweetthis]

I am excited for the potential we have at New Passion and I look forward to being able to provide the full time care that it needs. I’m excited for this new season of life where I can also provide the proper care for my family, as well as for myself physically. I’m excited for us to work together to make New Passion all God wants it to be!

October 15, 2014October 15, 2014

Creating a Great Church, Together (Part 1)

Old Church

Over the next several weeks, I am going to share some thoughts and challenges on how we can create a great church, together, at New Passion. I hope you’ll tune in each week.

The first step to creating a great church is to ARRIVE EARLY.

Notice, I didn’t say arrive on time. Typically, if we aim to arrive “on time” we set ourselves up to arrive late, especially if we face traffic issues or other complications along the way. It may seem elementary to ask people to arrive early, but here are some reasons why it’s important:

1. Glory not Guilt: We don’t aim to just be on time with anything of importance. When I go to Athens to see the Dawgs play, I don’t aim to just arrive on time. I want to get into the stadium, find my seat, go to the bathroom, purchase refreshments and be ready for the kickoff. I’m excited to be there and I don’t want to miss anything. If I aim to just get there on time, something can happen and cause me to miss a portion of the game. When Nicki and I recently went to see Expendables 3, we didn’t aim to just arrive on time, just as we don’t with any other movie. If we arrive in the theater as the movie is starting that means we’ve missed the previews, we’re going to end up in a horrible seat and once again, something could happen to make us late and we’d miss a portion of the movie. There’s no way I’m missing a second of Stallone on the big screen! I like to get to the theater, get my seat, go to the restroom, and catch all of the previews for upcoming movies. I am sure some of us try to arrive just on time to work, but some like to get in the building, get settled and clock-in without having to rush, risking a late clock-in….that could eventually cost you your job.

I don’t say these things to make you feel guilty. I have found guilt is a poor motivator. I can motivate with guilt until that guilt wears off and then the old behavior returns. I challenge you to arrive early for God’s GLORY. If we arrive early to those things that we value, that we’ve invested in, and that we don’t want to miss, why would we want to give God anything less than what we have given our favorite sports team? Regal Theaters? Or, your place of employment? Paul said, “So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” (1 Corinthians 10:31 ESV) I don’t want to miss anything that we do on Sundays at New Passion. I don’t want to give God less than I give my job, my favorite teams, or my favorite actor; none of those people or things provided my salvation like God did through Jesus. One of the ways that we create a great church, together, is by arriving early. God is not glorified when we are slack, he is glorified when we give him our best and give him our all. David said, “Not to us, O Lord, not to us, but to your name give glory….” (Psalm 115:1 ESV)

2.For the Community of Faith, not Yourself: It would be easy to share all of the benefits that you gain by committing to arrive to church early, but to be straight forward with you, as Christians we are not called to live our lives for ourselves, but rather we are called to do good to our faith community. Rick Warren opened his famous book, The Purpose Driven Life, with this life-altering statement, “It’s not about you!” Paul said, “So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith.”

“Everyone”: It’s disheartening to guests and to new families, who have only been to New Passion a few times to look around and see an empty auditorium when the service starts. By being early, you have the opportunity to be in your seat when the service starts, but you also have the opportunity to connect with those new guests and families when they’re sitting in seats all alone. This is just one way that we have the opportunity to do good to everyone, simply by arriving to church early.

“Household of Faith”: Our band works hard to provide a service that is uplifting to our hearts as we sing and worship our Savior and God, together. The band has a weekly practice where they take time out of their personal schedules to rehears the Sunday set list and learn new songs; they arrive early (7am) on Sundays to set up the stage, the tech booth and to rehearse the songs before the service starts (10:30am). The band does this to provide quality music during that portion of our worship service…and if you ask me, they do an amazing job. HOWEVER, it is extremely difficult to sing and lead worship to an empty room or a room with just guests, who don’t know the songs we sing and therefore stand silently. By arriving to church early, you have the opportunity to be there with the first strum of Jonothan’s guitar, you get to help fill the room with worship, as your voice fills the air, you get to help make guests feel comfortable in a full room and you make it easier on the band to actually have people to lead and sing with. You arriving early and participating is vitally important to the worship service. The band is not there to sing FOR us, they are there to lead us, so they can sing WITH us.

Another way you do good to the household of faith, by arriving early, is that you enable other people to enjoy the entire service. If you arrive at 10:30 (when church starts), or even at 10:35, the Guest Services team does not have the liberty to go into the auditorium because 1) we want everyone to receive a warm welcome, but 2) if you have children, they will need assistance getting checked in. By arriving early, you serve your church family by helping them get ministered to through the music portion of our service.

One final way that you do good to the household of faith, by arriving early, is that you do not cause disruptions to the PassionKidz environments, or to the adult service. It can be a major disruption when a large number of people are dropping children off in the Grove and the Ridge, after they have already started, as well it causes disruptions to the adults when a large number of people are walking in late and looking for seats.

If we want guests to be excited about what’s happening at New Passion, that excitement has to first flow through and be seen in us. Let’s work together to create an environment that is God glorifying, where we do good towards our community and the household of faith.

Let’s make a commitment, together, to arrive early and be in place to start the service powerfully each week! Instead of thinking of church starting at 10:30 a.m., think of it starting at 10 a.m., after all, each of us are the church, so “church” begins as soon as you walk through the door.

October 8, 2014

I Asked God….

I asked God to see through His eyes, so He made me a pastor.

I asked God to help me understand His grace, so He sent me addicts and alcoholics, and then he let me watch them relapse.

I asked God to help me love like He loves, so He sent me the homosexual who has been made an outcast by society….and even churches

I asked God to help me understand His patience, so He sent me the greedy who are more concerned with themselves than their neighbor

I asked God to help me understand His forgiveness, so He sent me parents of wayward children

I asked God to know His mercy, so He sent me the self-righteous

I asked God to understand His promises, so He sent me couples who are struggling in their marriage

I asked God to show me who I really am; He told me to simply open my eyes and look around me

The greatest pleasure of my life is to pastor New Passion Church and to serve as the manager of a local substance abuse program. Everyday I have the opportunity to share life with people who struggle to make it each day; they are messy, they are broken, and they definitely aren’t big on social graces….they are human. My daily experiences have shown me God in ways I would have never seen Him, doing anything else. The gospel is a beautiful and powerful message. I am grateful God has called me to pastor myself through many different people.