Tag: Parents

Trust is the emotional glue that binds followers and leaders together.
Warren Bennis and Bert Nanus

A Danger always presents itself when someone who is in a leadership role gains the trust of those they desire to follow them; for it is with that trust that they can lead their followers in a positive direction or in a negative one.

I can think back to many of the wrong ideas I had about life, marriage, church, Christianity and leadership and it usually originated from someone who had earned my trust and used their emotional bond to influence me with their ideas, thoughts, and opinions. The same can be said about the positive influences in my life, they too can be traced back to influencers who have played a major role in my life, my ministry, and my career. Today I am pointing out a handful of people who have had a positive influence in my life, whether small or great, some while I was growing up and others are more recent. Later this week I will name a few more people who have influenced me:

1. My Dad (Tim Carnes): I remember seeing a huge transition in my dad, from a day where he believed Carmen was not godly music to the night we drug him to a Third Day Concert and attempted to get him in a mosh pit (He is a Southern Gospel Nut). My dad was tough and strict at times, but he never forced us to conform to a Biblical teaching just because it was taught. I remember numerous times coming home from a Christian school excited about something I had learned in the Bible and being challenged to back the new found teaching up with scripture. He taught me to believe what I believe because the Bible taught it, not because man said it. He taught me to work hard and to make sure the family is taken care of, even if that means working a 2nd or 3rd shift at Wendy’s. He also taught me that you can overcome any situation in life if you put your mind to a task and work hard, he earned his Bachelors, his Masters, and Doctorate Degrees through Life Scholarships when he was in his 40’s. At the age of 50 my dad ran for the U.S. Senate in South Carolina against Lindsey Graham, which taught me that at any age we should continue to live lives of adventure and risk.

2. My Grandpa (Jack Carnes): A gentle but tough man. He drinks 2 tablespoons of apple cider vinegar everyday to prevent certain health problems, yet last year he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Yet he does not stop and he’ll keep giving 110% of his life everyday until the Lord takes him to Heaven. My grandpa has two fingers on one hand, because he disobeyed his dad at the young age of 12 and played with a dynamite cap, it exploded taking off his fingers. Through his life story I have been taught that there are times you have to work 2 and 3 jobs to pay the bills and provide for your family. God comes first, your family second, and then your ministry.

3. Doug Fields: I remember when I first got hired full time in Student Ministry; I thought I knew a lot, I didn’t. I got a copy of the PDYM Book and devoured it. I remember being stopped at traffic lights trying to get one more sentence in. I came from churches who’s lifeline was programs and rules, so to hear an approach that focused very little on programs and strongly on relationships, processes, and freedom was liberating to a young and naieve pastor. Doug through his messages and leadership played a major role in that development, though it was from a distance at first.

4. Melvin Minitor: He allowed me at the age of 11 or 12 to be involved in ministry. It was during my involvement in the ministry he led that I felt the Lord call me into full time ministry. I learned how to share my faith with all walks of life as we sent almost every Saturday serving migrants in south Georgia. He has shown me the most genuine love of Christ I have ever seen and it has given him a deep love for people. He is one of the most genuine Christ followers I know. He is now very old and feeble, but I know everyday is a passionate walk with his Savior.

5. Shaney “Waney” Padgett: Shane and his wife Diana have been very good friends to my wife and me. They are such awesome people who love Jesus and love others. Shane has a life motto that is contagious, Biblical, yet short and effective: “Loving Jesus, Loving Others, and Pursuing Both!” I’ve stolen this because it says everything. My deal has always been to passionately pursue Christ because he passionately pursued us, and through that our hearts would be led to passionately pursue others. Shane’s motto says that effectively and in simpler terms. Shane has a passion for Jesus that is contagious and it is evident in the life of the students he has had the opportunity to invest in.

6. Chuck Gordon: My pastor (the Church @ Greenbrier). I have been able to learn many things from Chuck in my year and a half serving at Greenbrier. Nicki and I left a very tough situation, and Chuck (along with our church) provided a breath of fresh air for us when we needed it the most. We started leaving church on Sunday feeling challenged to grow in our walk with Christ.

7. Josh Griffin and Pete Wilson: Josh Griffin (High School Pastor @ Saddleback) influenced me to start blogging and I love it. He is also the happiest guy I know…I never see him without a smile (Live or on Podcast). Pete Wilson (Senior Pastor @ Cross Point Community Church) has influenced me to blog in a different way than the way I started out. Instead of being one sided, I now try to involve others in the conversation. Blogging is much more fun when others are participating along with you. The authenticity of Pete and his team is humbling and inspiring.

Influences (Part 2) will be coming later this week…

Join the Conversation – Who has been a positive influence in your life?