When Relationships Trump Ego – A Lebron James Story

lebronjames_150hgt I was happy when the Lebron James decision came last night. I couldn’t even turn on the news without seeing a report about it or being told to go to their website to answer their poll on where I thought he would go. Now, here I am diving into the conversation. Just to get it out there, I didn’t think LeBron would stay in Cleveland, I was leaning towards New York, after all, that’s what everyone has been talking about for two years now. After all, that’s what was going to be the best for Lebron’s brand, his bank account, and his ego.

Okay, great, that’s out of the way….

With every athlete there is an ego. I personally didn’t think Lebron’s television “Decision” on ESPN was the best decision. In fact, I thought it was quite egotistical, a little self-centered. I had a slight change of heart when I found out proceeds from the television performance was going to the Boys and Girls Club of America.

dewaynewade_150hgtI also had a change of heart in Lebron’s choice from last night to this morning. When Lebron mentioned that he was going to South Beach in Miami, I at first wanted to tweet that he would never be seen in the same light at Michael Jordan, even if he did win multiple championships, I still believe that, but that’s the point of my change of heart.

I read an article on ESPN from Bill Simmons about a pact that Lebron James, Dewayne Wade, Chris Bosh and Chris Paul made two years ago. In the article Bill reports that the four players made a pact that they would all play with each other in a single city one day. It has been widely reported all over the media that Wade, James, and Bosh are all good friends and in the end, I have no doubt that is what made the final decision for Lebron.

I find it interesting that most of the outrage surrounds the decision by Lebron to go to Miami, however, the fact is, it is requiring a huge sacrifice on his part to attempt to win a championship. After all, that’s what professional sports are all about, winning championships. Lebron hurts his brand, he sacrifices his ego, and he sacrificed a lot of money (although Florida’s no state income tax may have helped there too). Chris Bosh and Dewayne Wade are also sacrificing many of the same things that Lebron is sacrificing, all to play with each other and to win a championship. That’s truly unheard of with All-Star athletes.

chrisbosh_150hgtThe media questions why things are progressing the way they are with the ego and selfishness of professional athletes, yet, we feed it. I think a majority of people who followed the Lebron situation wanted him to make a choice that would “benefit” him the most. Even his entourage advised him not to go to Miami because of the things he would be sacrificing. Instead of celebrating an athlete that would give his television proceeds to the Boys and Girls Club, sacrifice at least 30 million dollars in salary, sacrifice his legacy as a player that could win a championship in a “cursed” city and be the “leader” of the team; we make him the black sheep. We would rather celebrate greed and self-centeredness over sacrifice and selflessness.

I am sure there are plenty of things that we can fault Lebron on and I can definitely understand Cleveland’s hurt and pain with Lebron leaving, however, the fact is, this is a business and Lebron has to make the best decision as someone who is employeed in the industry. I am sure his decision was tough, but in the end, I think relationships trumped ego and that is at least one lesson that should be taught to our kids and at least one thing that should be praised throughout this situation.

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Velocity 2010 – Pete Wilson

petewilson-buttonVelocity 2010 Church Planter’s Conference

Breakout #2 Speaker: Pete Wilson (Twitter)

“Everyone’s Welcome, Nobody’s Perfect, Anything is Possible”

Churches Desiring Transformational Community -

Studies Show:

  • One thing that separates happy people from unhappy people is the simple idea of being connected in community.
  • The level of satisfaction in churches is determined by the level of community experienced.

Someone said…”I’ve never known anyone who has failed to love & succeeded at life.”

Genesis 2:18 “It is not good for man to be alone.”

You were created with the capacity for deep relationships

Develop a Philosophy of community before you develop a Strategy of community.
(What is the Heart behind the strategy?)

*Your Church MUST understand that Everybody is Welcome.

Luke 15:2 But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law muttered, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.”

Romans 13:8

* Has your church created environments where people can belong before they believe?

Some Church Models = Believe, Belong, Behave

Church Models adapting to Current Culture = Behave, Belong, Believe
(It may be that people enter your church by participating in a church service event for the community rather  than through the Sunday morning Worship Service)

Your Church Must Accept that Nobody is Perfect.

Matthew 7:1

Luke 18:10-12

The sins you find the most appalling to God are the ones you don’t struggle with.

Your Church Must Believe Anything is Possible.

It’s the church’s job to create environments where we help people discover their new name.

Secular businesses & organizations understand that “Everyone is Welcome” and that “Nobody is Perfect” – There is nothing overtly “Christian” about that. The church has to believe in addition that “Anything is Possible!”

If our churches are a true “Just As I Am Churches” – We would not be able to put out enough chairs for the people who would come and we could not plant enough churches.

Velocity Conference: Main Session 1 Highlights – - Main Session 2 Highlights – - Main Session 3 Highlights – - Main Session 4 Highlights – - Breakout Session 3 with Tony Morgan Highlights – - Main Session 6 Highlights

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Stronger: A Weekend for Men

stronger

In just a few of hours, 14 men will be piling into cars and driving about three hours up the road for “Stronger: A Weekend for Men.” We are going to a conference that solely focuses on men. I have no idea what to expect from this conference, I’ve never been, in fact to be honest, from the outside, its probably a conference I would typically avoid, but I am trusting the advice and the urging of one of my team members. I hope it’s as good as its been built up to be.

The conference is not called Stronger, but we are calling our weekend Stronger, because that is our goal from this trip. My desire is to see the men of New Passion become Stronger in every area of their lives. The fact is, I am younger than most of the men at our church, therefore instead of speaking into their lives on areas where they probably have had more experience, I feel it is healthy to allow other, older and wiser people do the talking for me. My biggest desire beyond men growing stronger in their personal lives and in their relationships at home and at work, is to see relationships develop with each other here at New Passion.

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A Stepping Stone

stonestairs
Friday night, we had our first annual adult Christmas party for New Passion Church. I believe it was a major stepping stone for our church and that this one little party could serve as a huge turning point for us.

I believe relationships are the key to success in any church and in any ministry. I remember starting small groups in our student ministry at a former church. I believed in creating smaller environments where our growing group of students could be known and cared for. It worked. I remember our high school group starting in Billy’s 3 bedroom apartment. We had 4 and 5 groups meeting in that one apartment. We utilized bedrooms, the living room, the kitchen…anywhere we could fit kids, we did it.

They were successful. I believe for several reasons. Students felt like they were involved, they found out that there were caring adults who were genuinely concerned for them, and they grew spiritually. I think this environment made it comfortable for students to invite their friends, therefore we grew even more.

I saw some great chemistry on Friday night. Wives who literally just met were standing around talking as if they were friends for 18 years. People who literally come through the doors of the school where we meet, drop their kid off, attend service, pick their kid up, and leave for home (in that specific order) were able to stop for a little while and interact with our team and with other people from the church. There was a lot of smiles and a lot of laughter. It was a great night. Sunday rolled around and some of those same people who are in and out of the church in a flash, slowed down just a little bit and enjoyed conversation with some of their new friends from the church. There was a buzz surrounding our Community Groups which will be kicking off on January 10, 2010.

I believe healthy relationships are a key ingredient to a healthy church, and I believe Friday night’s party helped add that ingredient to New Passion Church…I can’t wait to see what happens once our groups get off the ground. New Passion will be an unstoppable force! I guarantee it :)

npcchristmasparty

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The Devastation of Losing Trust

tiger-woods-family

Tiger Woods was completely wrong; I think we would all agree with that, unless you are currently cheating on your husband or wife. I believe everyone has problems in their lives, so to throw stones at him would be wrong from a spiritual standpoint, but totally justified from a human standpoint.

I’ve never really liked Tiger Woods. He comes across as arrogant and rude. So, I typically pull for anyone who plays against him, especially my favorite lefty-golfer, Phil Mickelson. However, I do want to see Tiger restored as a person and I want to see his marriage restored, not just for the sake of the children or a business deal, but because Tiger and his wife Elin are people.

I do think however, Tiger has put himself in a position that is going to be extremely hard to overcome and to receive that restoration. One of the greatest things that Tiger has ruined in this situation is his trust. Losing trust in a marriage (or in any relationship) is a devastating thing. I believe trust is no different than faith. You are blindly committing to someone all of who you are, believing that in the end, they will have been a good steward of what you’ve given. Tiger destroyed his trust. I think it would have been easier for Elin & Tiger had he made this choice with one mistress, but now they are reporting up to 10 or 11, possibly more.

But, there lies the problem for Tiger and why his choices have become so devastating for his future. Who can trust anything he says? When trust is lost, the negative and the worst is always assumed. One of Tiger’s mistresses, Jamie Grubbs, issued a heart-felt (haha!) apology to Elin, Tiger’s wife. Click Here for Video – I’ve never seen worst acting in my life, and I don’t think what she says in the video is true. (Ask my wife, I’ve got a scary talent for discerning people) But, what can Tiger say? How can he refute anything she says and be believed? In addition, another 5 to 10 women could come out and accuse Tiger of having an affair with them. As soon as some women see the dollar signs these other ladies are bringing in, the temptation to accuse will arise. Where were these women before all of this news broke? Why come forward now? Publicity & money. I guarantee, their names have been Googled several thousands of times in the recent weeks. So, how can Tiger refute anyone who falsely accuses him? He can’t. His trust is crushed into a million pieces and it will take a long time for him to reshape them into anything worth accepting. Forgiveness can be immediate, but when trust is lost, it takes time to rebuild.

The trust Tiger lost may very well have cost him his career or at least limited him to what tournaments he can play in as a pro golfer. Will this cause his sponsors to jump ship? Will it prevent him from breaking some of the world records held by some of Golf’s greatest legends, that he was bound to break? Will it ultimately cost him his marriage because he is not willing to make the sacrifices to his career that Elin is requiring? All of that is still to be seen. Right now, Tiger’s kingdom appears to be crumbling around him.

I am and have been praying for his family, and that God would reveal himself to them through this situation. I hope to see them restored in the future.

Join the Conversation: What are your thoughts on the situation and on the devastation of losing trust?


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A Love Letter From God

My friend Hank Murphy sang this song at our CSRA See You At the Pole Event last night.

I like what he told the students…”Just listen to this love letter from God to You…”

I love this song, its called “How He Loves Us.” – I found this video on You Tube with it being performed.
(In my opinion Hank and his band did a better job…just my opinion :) )

Here are some of the words that are my favorite parts of the song:

“He is jealous for me
Love’s like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy
When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory
and I realize just how beautiful You are and how great your affections are for me.”

“So we are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
If grace is an ocean we’re all sinking
So heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss
and my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way”

That he loves us,”

So sit back and listen to this love letter from God to you…

Join the Conversation: What is God’s Love Letter Telling You?

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Sports Philosophy Truth or Opinion?

I was listening to game 1 of the Atlanta Braves‘ double header against the New York Mets today on my way back to the office from lunch. The commentator was talking about some troubles that are taking place on the Mets’ squad, here is the philosophy of the commentator:

“It doesn’t matter whether you like or love each other on the team. All that matters is that you go out and play hard, and then go your separate ways after the game.”

I don’t believe I fully agree with this philosophy. Maybe on a sports team if you have a lot of individual talent, but then that talent can only take you so far. As well, when a team is built around hard work and talent, individuals have the tendency to do their own thing and go their own way. I believe it is important to have good re pore and unity amongst team members, a single focus and a single goal. This happens through strong relationships.

So, what’s your thoughts? Can a team (whether a sports team, a business team, a leadership team, a ministry team, etc.) win if everyone comes to their “job” works and plays hard, but never does anything to build relationships outside the job or even on the job?

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